Dedicated to me

I am falling apart in ways I don’t understand myself

My ways I criticize myself

All my life I have been religiously hard on myself

Second guessing my own abilities

I am nothing but a loser with a degree

A burden growing on the shoulders

A waste of space

Leaching out on parents hardwork

Yet I am failing to understand myself

In the voice that haunts me

The bridge of responsibilities calls

Yet I am caged in prison of reality

Unable to overcome

Failing to keep my emotions at bay

This sadness has destroyed my nights

Has darkened my daylight

Let alone my nightmares

I am burning with pain

Without a medication of a solution near sight

A parasite feeding on my brain

If only over thinking could burn calories

I would be dead by now

This is not how I wish to start the next year. The baggage has to end. The forceful check-in to reality has to be done. Life doesn’t have a security check,it’s meant to exhaust me, challenge me and make me a rebellious failure fit for my success at the end of the day.I have to learn to accept that it’s ok to over qualify these unspoken emotions and trauma of over thinking. It’s about time I go ahead to the terminal of 2019. For a new start, new me and with a new attitude.

Dear challenges do pull your socks up because the devil in me has ignighted and is preparing for the battle of a lifetime. Make sure you make it worth fighting for. What fun, is a battle that self vaccinated itself before it actually began.

I have to board this flight of 2020. To a new day. Happy new year and to a determined fire in me.

Come-on 2020..

Yours faithfully

©G V Raghavasree